“Hi Mark,
I
know you have been busy and possibly in that all day meeting today, but I
really need an ETA on the missing report. Because your report contains data I
need to finish my report, I might miss my own deadline if I don’t get your
report soon. Please let me know when you think you can get your report sent
over to me, or even if you can send the data I need in a separate email.
I
really appreciate your help.
Jane”
(Laureate Education, Inc., 2012).
Written – When I read this I experienced Jane as feeling urgent, conscientious,
and compassionate. She is clear about her request and also steps outside her
own perspective to share insight into Mark’s workload and offer a compromise solution.
If I got this email I would make it a priority to give Jane what she needs and
thank her for her patience.
Audio – Next, I listened to an audio recording of Jane reading
the same communication. Again, Jane came across as urgent, conscientious, and
compassionate, although slightly less assertive.
Video – Finally, I watched a video of Jane speaking the
communication. Jane seemed friendly, supportive, and quite a bit less assertive
in the email and audio. Jane did something that women often do (and it drives
me crazy!), which is to make a statement sound like a question by raising her
voice inflection at the end of the sentence. “So please let me know…? If you
can send it over soon?” (Laureate Education, Inc., 2012). This diminishes the
urgency of the situation and suggests that she is flexible about waiting for
the data. “According to Deborah Tannen, we hear a downward cadence as ‘closed’
or ‘final,’ with the extreme being ‘controlling.’ Conversely, we hear an upward
cadence as ‘open’ and ‘flexible’ with the extreme being ‘indecisive’” (Tannen,
2011).If I were an over-scheduled Mark, I would not likely prioritize getting Jane’s
data to her.
After this exercise I reflected on the nature of communication
among some of the project teams I’ve worked with. All have blended written,
audio and face-to-face communication. Is one mode better than another?
I prefer written communication, and I want it to be clear
and concise. (Ernest Hemingway never wasted a word, and I wish more people were that way.) Some people need to give chapter and verse of everything they say,
and others like to chit chat for a minute or two before they discuss the issue
at hand.
A project manager needs to be able to reach and receive from
everyone on the team, regardless of their communication style. This is easier
when the PM is familiar with the team. Once I recognize someone’s style I make
an effort to communicate with them in that style and mode. It helps ensure that
the message sent is actually received.
References
Laureate Education, Inc., (Producer). (2012). The Art of Effective Communication. [Multimedia Program]. Baltimore, MD: Author.
Laureate Education, Inc., (Producer). (2012). The Art of Effective Communication. [Multimedia Program]. Baltimore, MD: Author.
Tannen, D. (2011). The
eloquent woman blog. Retrieved from http://eloquentwoman.blogspot.com/2011/09/do-you-end-sentences-with-upward.html
